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The pursuit of mediocrity is always successful. Was a mantra to a guru HRM that I was head hunted by years ago. She pushed me to stretch out of my comfort zones and aim to be legendary. What a role model she was and is. OK service just isn't good enough. "I shopped at New World today and nothing bad happened to me." - said no one to anyone ever! Perhaps I'm just having a bad day but I'm really a tad angry and frustrated. I'm f'd off. At the ineptitude and lack of drive I've been experiencing lately. If my anger at others really is a mirror of what's going on for me personally then I guess its a loud call that I need to push myself harder. To scull a shot of life's wake up call each morning and realise none of us have the time not to get this. Reason 1 for the Rickshaw Run. Time to push the limits. D.A.R.E again to live out loud to see how far I can go doing amazing things to support others and to feel the colour it adds to my life. But first - get the work done, the proposal emailed, the invoice out, the GST in, the house sorted and the washing put away pronto. Check out CK Lewis on you tube - "Everything is awesome yet nobody is happy"; to get the drift of what I'm saying. We are experiencing the anthropocene. The time epoch where humanity holds the perceived balance of power on the planet and it's wasted on a generation of us with a huge sense of entitlement demonstrating activity that inspires very little exemplary at all. The generational inequity is daunting - benefits, expectations of social welfare, government and entitlement are everywhere. You don't have to move your feet far off your ottoman or even lean forward on your couch to hear the media bag yet another aspect of how hard life is in today's world. Get real! Count a few of your own first world problems... The charger on my i phone 5 means that now none of my techno wired house features work without adapters is an all too common cry. I remind myself that the women of Macetown managed to wear layers of white petticoats under well pressed dresses laundered by hand at minus 14 degrees c in the river in winter any time I want to B-itch about having to fold my washing warm and soft from the dryer. Those with the means manage to excuse ourselves from the most character building of activities. Because when we are executives we buy into the perks. A lust for luxury and desire to be elite. Convincing ourselves that success is a ticket out of service and selflessness. We deserve to sleep in, eat out, have nannies, fly first class while someone else scrubs the dunny, disciplines or hugs the kids and empties the cat litter. In training sessions when asked to describe customers most groups serve a nation of drama queens, haters, wasters and complainers. Put that together with most of the customers who are getting appalling service every where they go. What a bunch of no hopers we've all turned into. Are we really scrapping the bottom of the wine barrel then whinging at the sediment? When those still unemployed are there because they won't pass the drug tests or don't want to work the public holidays. Most weeks I come up with a couple of start up business ideas. I've encouraged my kids to sell horse poo, wash cars, pick herbs to DO more. Yet an hour a day after school and I've spoiled them. So right now all of you hands up. If you are the person out there giving the crap service and whinging when you get worse service elsewhere this is the time to line up next to me, stand up and be counted. What? it's not you? If it's not you and it's not me then who on earth could it be? Is it because we have all been caught up in the quest to be entrepreneurial , creative types who can multi task and create a great work life balance? Even those who can't read or write because it's not our first language or we have a different learning style to that which the system operates in. How is it that all of us manage to stuff around finishing little and creating mayhem for others to sort out in our wake. While we primp, preen and posture, throw tanturms, cheat or lie, blog, network and lunch? Maybe we justify our mediocrity as we work 14 hour days, go without breakfast or lunch and take care of three kids while volunteering to coach the touch rugby game. Respect for people, places and things seems to have fallen by the wayside. As we meet to discuss the values for private schooling it's unanimous - manners, old school traditions. Opening doors, calling people by their surnames, standing when the boss, teacher or customer enters, making eye contact, smiling, acknowledging each other, respecting your elders are traditions we long for to give a feeling of security and comfort. If kids can't wear a formal uniform at school how the hell will they show up to work on time and dressed for success. If they swear at their mothers, and graffiti their desks and bodies will they feature on police 10 seven instead of the high school year book or the rich list ? I witness senior mangers leaving for an hours drive to a meeting, 10 mins prior to its scheduled start time. Keeping 10 people waiting ...where is the cost benefit ratio in that? Getting passport photos supplied electronically when children's applications must be hard copy takes three trips to the camera shop to sort out. None of it on purpose, but maybe that is our problem. Together in love spirit and purpose is engraved on the inside of my wedding band. Ten years this month - maybe I should now tatoo it across the back of my hand. To remind me that the connection to life is bigger than I've seen and the obligation is to get on with it, now. There is the wwoofer who came to help in the garden, learning on a study abroad scheme at the expense of the UK government and courtesy of Otago university. A sweet kid it was a major to drag herself out to meet the day before 11am, or fill more than a bag of horse poop an hour. The garden she meticulously weeded does demonstrate that she may be well suited for the career in archeology that she is following. Indeed history may be made while she digs. It took four days to clear 50 square metres, correction 10 of them are still undone. As a trainer I know that I have a tendancy to give the level of instruction that I would need to do a job. So I felt a dash of pride when I'd explained grid by grid what I wanted to have happen. Over the week my own speed increased as did my productivity. In an attempt to lead from the front I got a hell of a lot done. She was a great hit playing with the kids and read 7 books in the week that she was here. So I'm sure that contributed something to the collective good. But was it worth it? Consider my lovely neighbours scenario who had random house sitters offer to take care of their place over the summer. Great, though now they are gone and have left ALL their stuff in the garage, no rent, no fee, no care. When asked when it's going to move... their new place isn't very big... And? the point is?? Is it time to embrace a paradigm shift back to excellence? With unitasking and the rise of the intraprenurial. Some B.F.O's for this weeks journey... Focus on one thing at a time do it exceptionally well and finish it. Work in the business not on it. Look for ways to do things better and faster. Use less resources to be more productive. Respect for people places and property. Not wrecking the planet cause it's where we keep all our stuff. Time to lift the game and demonstrate good sportsmanship. If your not first you are last and second is the first loser. Celebrate winners - Drink a cup of metaphysical concrete and harden up. I'll give it a day or two and let you know how I go.
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I never did a day's work in my life. It was all fun. Thomas Edison Take it easy baby , take it as it comes, be a specialist in having fun - Jim Morrison "Are you having any fun yet ?" One line mantras. B.F.O's - Blinding Flash of the Obvious moments. The AHA feeling. An opportunity to sum up the essence of your experience in just a few words. To me that is the phrase ....Best said to another when you are perhaps experiencing something that is no fun at all. Particularily useful when life seems to suck the big kumara. It's a cunning reminder that we are here for a good time not a long time and are fully capable of enjoying the journey. The sort of statement we see on a bumper sticker and want to recall for life. Last millenium I was heading to a meeting with the bank manager, WINZ had cancelled a trial program for transistioning long term unemployed people into work in Queenstown. We had already committed to the office space, training room and team. Our land lord was about to change the locks if the lease wasn't paid. I had no idea how I was going to keep the business let alone my life afloat. When on the way down the mall my financial controller turned to me and said... "Are you having any fun yet?" Instantly the pressure was off, we looked at each other the stress lifted and we began to laugh or was it cry? From memory a lot of both, we had to sit tears streaming to compose ourselves into the concerned adult individuals that we knew the finance representatives would assume that we would be. And the issue was certainly and suddenly back in perspective. I can't even remember how we sorted out the rent that day but we did, the world still turned but most importantly we relaxed, we had some fun and we learnt. Learn from the mistakes of others you don't live long enough to make them all yourself. If you obey all the rules your miss all the fun - Katherine Hepburn Sick to the stomach, a need to pee, sweaty palms, racing heart. A collegue reminded me recently are all symptoms of excitement. I'd been wrestling with my anxiety after the death of three significant others in my inner circle and it was manifesting in similar displays in my middle child. Time to examine what we like to DO when we are excited. Dress for a special occasion, day dream, plan, write a journal. make, give and receive gifts, find like minded souls to share the journey. Immerse in the task, become absorbed in the moment. Some purposeful choices to re-label the state and enjoy the day, moment by second. To nurture my inner children with happy voices, hugs, bike rides, compliments, squeals of glee, baking, adding novelty, parties and fun times with friends. To walk barefoot in the icy cold river collecting stones. To look up and see the light not at the end of the tunnel but right here we we are. In some call centres there are Fun Managers. The person whose role it really is to create the doughnut day and hand out the silly hats. It's not the wank factor the cynics among you would label it as. The best pull it off with aplomb. Celebrating moments, creating themes adding value to the brand and the day. Establishing employee retention and decreasing challenging customer moments. Because every moment deserves to be a great one. As we would like to think that Buddha said... "The trouble is we think we have time." Go on I D.A.R.E. you - Decide, Act, Review and Enjoy - Then do it again.... and again...and again. One more time with feeling! Climb something, set a goal, make a plan, throw yourself off or into anything. Scare your self silly. Fascination comes from fascinare - to cast a spell. Create magic in your day. Go out feel the warmth of sunlight on your skin or eat what it is you love for lunch. Drink out of beautiful glass, tell a joke, love an animal, smile more at yourself in the mirror. Acknowledge your natural beauty - you are the oldest you have ever been and the youngest you will be in this moment. Experience your wealth - you have life. Invite a group of random friends to play tennis and drink Pimms. Ensure enough of them know you well enough to turn up in nightclub attire, and 6 inch heels. Have new racquets and balls on display but touch neither. Drink the Pimms and add champagne. Go out. Pretend you are a tennis club. Talk loudly and passionately about who has the best back hand. Stay out all night. Tell stories on the couch. Laugh hard, long and loud about who wears the biggest nana pants. When your husbands walk in from their fishing trip in the morning throw the lillies out of the vase and pretend you are drinking the water. Are you having any fun yet? If something doesn't feel right, look right, sound right, smell right or seem right - it probably isn't. Yet how often do we let ourselves or others convince us that we are manifesting drama, not seeing things clearly or that we are wrong? When I teach conflict resolution in workshops we talk about dealing with issues when you first experience discomfort. And why we often don't choose to act-i-on things right at that first point of niggle. I ask how often was that first feeling wrong when you look back at a scenario that blew up. Answer never. I have coached clients who have been at the extremes of the elements during military service and survived when others have taken their own lives. Their gut instincts kept them alive there yet in the boardroom they don't trust the gut feeling that someone may be manipulating a situation. I bet they are not wrong. I've had that quiet little voice that seems to rise up from somewhere deep inside of me tell me I'm being managed or led up a path that is not of my own making. Yet I've allowed others to talk over it, to tell me I have a problem or that I am the one who needs to toe the line. Only to realise every single time further down the track that the voice was spot on and that I was indeed correct not to waiver. That my instincts were on target, that I could have saved myself a lot of grief, self doubt and mayhem by belief in my self and my ability to judge what is going to serve me well. Our instincts are to keep us safe and to trigger the flight or fight skills primate in all of us. Some like smoke alarms are now hair triggered towards anxiety and we are over conditioned to dumbing down our feelings and responses. Perhaps you body has been screaming for so long for you to listen to it that now it reacts to every threat with caution. Because if you haven't listened in the past I better act up real quick to get you to listen now. If you start listening again to what your instincts are trying to tell you the relief is instant. The faith empowering and the self trust strengthening. Your soul calms down and you don't have to panic any more because you are now aware you will handle it, the universe doesn't bring you anything that you can't handle and we can take care of ourselves. It's the voices in our solar plexus that we need to be quiet enough to hear. For those who are busy telling themselves that they don't have any little voices to listen to it's exactly that voice that I'm talking about. The one that tells you gently that you or someone you are in connection with is acting out of integrity. That what they are saying thinking and doing are not lining up. Just go with it. Buy yourself some time and say thanks but no thanks, or not just now. Take the time to listen and to trust what you are feeling. What's the rush. Try it today. Tune into your instincts next time you have to make a decision. Don't weigh up the logic just go quiet allow yourself to tap into source and ask yourself yes or no? Stay or Go? Block or Flow? Go with that first answer calmly and gently one small step at a time. Let me know how it works for you. Put your gut out there to test the wind. Garden art is my current thing.
More truthfully weeding the garden is my current thing and it's hardly a work of art. That's what you get when the engineer in the family decides to put an acre into veges on the 5 acre block but works away solving the nations infrastructure issues most of the week. So aside from writing because to write is to breathe, I'm loving my green fingers, broken finger nails and fluffy inners of my Hunter gummies. I'd love my sustainable paradise to be a work of art but currently with the drought and full summer harvest upon me I really only feel like we've created a shit sandwich. I spend a lot of time irrigating, picking and panicking that everything is doomed, nothing will thrive and I'll fail. I'd like to put a big peg on it to remind me that this is what I value - like a memo note to self. A great work of art takes time, passion and commitment. And sometimes it's the preparation of the site, the collection of your tools and knowing what it is that you want to create that you must first give your focus to before success is achieved. If you've had some of your better ideas hit hurdles or get all caught up in schmoo too ...Congratulate yourself. You don’t have to eat the schmoo bap - However you do have a great example of contrast. You know what it is that you still need to work on, what you don’t like, what stinks and what turns you off. You know what failure feels like and you know you want to avoid anymore of it. Sometimes you have to say NO so that you can create the space to say YES. Saying NO to things, people and projects is the fastest way I have found to bring YES to fruition. |
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